Live Your Best Life!

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟, 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤, 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐰 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐦. We all have an inner dialogue which can look like an inner coach, or an inner critic. What you think about yourself impacts how you feel, how you behave, and the results you get in life. The goal is to have self-talk that encourages you to want to improve, while also accepting the person you are without harsh criticism.

The way you talk to yourself can cause painful emotions, which makes it harder to show up and behave in the way you want to. If you sit with these painful or negative emotions for an extended period of time, it can negatively impact the results you get in your life. It can also negatively impact your relationships because you may either withdraw, if you don’t feel worthy of a relationship, or it could cause you to push someone away because they don’t want to hear you talk negatively about...

Recently I was working with a client who was finally able to uncover how terribly she speaks to herself. She regularly says things like, “I messed that up”, “I will never have enough time”, “I don’t ever follow through with things”, and “I’m always disappointing people”. It has become a habit for these phrases, or other phrases like them, to run through her mind. In addition, she always takes the blame when things don’t go well, and rarely takes the credit when things do go well, because she does not want to seem like she is bragging.

Do you see how problematic this can be for her self-esteem, for her overall emotional state, and for her confidence regarding being able to accomplish the things she really wants in her life? Her thinking pattern had become so routine that she was not even questioning the accurateness of her thoughts. She was just accepting them as true, even if there was plenty of evidence to prove...

Do you sometimes feel like you are lacking in confidence? Do you sometimes not take actions that you think you would have if you had more confidence? Do you sometimes look at other people and wish you could be more confident and surer of yourself the way they seem to be? Many people experience this, at least some of the time.

The first thing to keep in mind is that self-confidence comes from within you. You may sometimes tie it to external events; however, it is always what you think about yourself that increases or diminishes self-confidence. For example, if something happens at work where you are given some negative feedback from your boss, you may think that what your boss said to you created a lack of self-confidence regarding your ability to do you job well, however, it is what you think about what your boss said that impacts your self-confidence. You may think that someone criticizing the way you look caused you to lack confidence, however, it is how you take it in,...