I am someone who likes to have a clear plan. I like to map goals out, break things down into tasks, know exactly what needs to happen, and assign a timeline to them. Can you relate to this process? This process works for many things such as cooking and following a recipe, having a list of chores that need to get done, having a list of tasks that need to get done at work, and mapping out a plan for a vacation. What this does not work well for is when you are setting big goals for yourself, and trying to do something you have never done before.
When you are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, doing something you have never done before, maybe doing something that both scares and excites you, you won’t have everything figured out when you start. Because of this, many people never take any action to make their dream or goal a reality. They get so stuck on the “how” part of the dream, that they decide it is not for them when they cannot figure out each step ahead of time. I have been there, and this can be challenging.
If you find yourself in this situation, it may be because you are looking to your past to inform you about what you are capable of. You may also be looking at other people who have done the thing that you want to do and telling yourself that you are not worthy, or capable of doing what they have done. You may also be telling yourself that they had some advantage that you don’t have. Automatically, your brain will start offering you all the reasons this is not for you, because you don’t already have a bulletproof plan for how you will achieve your goal.
Don’t let all of this garbage in your mind cause you to give up. Notice it. Note it. Thank your brain for trying to keep you comfortable. Remind yourself that you don’t need to have it all figured out right now. Finally, tell yourself that you will map out what you can and trust that the rest will come to you exactly as it is supposed to. Having a plan is a good thing because it will help keep you on course, however, if you are trying to do something big, you won’t already know everything you need to know to achieve it. You will not have all the skills necessary to be successful and that is the beauty of pursuing something big.
When you let go of all of the details of the “how” and appreciate the journey, and who you become along the way, you can’t lose. Will you make mistakes? Probably. Will you be frustrated or discouraged? Likely if you are pushing yourself to do something new and challenging. Will you want to give up at times? Almost certainly. Will you question if you are capable of it? Absolutely. When you second guess yourself or encounter obstacles, keep going. Remind yourself that you are growing and learning every step of the way and that growth will lead you to new ideas, skills, and strategies that will help you achieve your goal.
If you are trying to achieve a goal and find yourself struggling to keep going, ask yourself the following questions:
Answer each of the above questions thoughtfully and then keep going. This is an activity that you should do daily, even on the days you are feeling positive and energized about your goal. By doing it daily, you will consistently remind your brain why the goal is important to you and why you are capable of achieving it. You will remind yourself of how you will show up and how you will feel, which will pull you forward towards your goal. With enough reminders, your brain will stop doubting you and start cheering for you because it will believe that you are capable of achieving big things, even if you don’t know all of the “how” when you start.
Live your best boss lady life.
Karen Vincent Solutions
P.S. If you want more tips, advice, and inspiration on a regular basis, you can follow me on Instagram @bestbossladylife HERE.